This proverbial wagon is a bitch. I've fallen off more times in my life than I can even keep track of. This past weekend is no exception. I have a really hard time staying on my plan. I really don't have a specific plan other than limiting my caloric intake and burning the calories. Calories in and Calories out. And watching portion sizes, which I really struggle with the most.
I know this is a lifestyle change. I have a really hard time not reverting back to my old ways sometimes. I will do great for a week or two, then have a weekend where I just can't seem to gain control. It's like I've deprived myself of all of my usual favorites or eating out spots, that I go nuts and without even thinking about it, I just have blinders on and I can't see anything except what is in front of me and it's all I can do to get to THAT food. I turn my brain off and I don't even think. Nothing matters except getting it. I decided a while back that I won't tell myself that something is off limits. It makes you want it all that much more! But moderation. Take ONE serving and be done with it. Fill up on veggies, salad, soups, i love all of those. But for some reason I take one bit and it's everything about that bite, taste, texture, all of it and I want more and more and just can't seem to stop. I have realized that I need to take my bite or my portion size, eat it, enjoy it, slowly (maybe with a baby spoon?) but then I have to find something else to do, immediately following or I will tempt myself to another piece or two or five. So I usually plan what my escape route will be first, before I take that bite. So as soon as I take my bite, I leave, go somewhere else and do what I had planned to do. Usually when I do that, I come back, I'm satisfied, I'm not tempted to take more. I have even found I can stare that food down when I come back in, say, from my walk to avoid temptation, and not want any more of it for now, because I had a piece already and walking took my mind off of it and by the time I got back, the hunger or the deep desire to stuff myself mindlessly has passed. I'm satisfied. I don't need more.
Anyway, I did fall off of that wagon. But at least I realized I fell and I'm capable of getting back up again. I'll get there. I know I will. I just have to realize I built years worth of bad habits and it might take me a while to break each and every one of those habits down and build new, healthy ones, in it's place.
that was a great blog. i totally understand where you was coming from. i've been down that same path numerous times myself. its very hard to do on your own, believe me. i'm actually doing a weight loss clinic through my doctor. i've learned so much about myself with the weight i've loss so far. its way to much to type, but i'd be glad to chat with you some day if we ever get the chance. plus i'll also be updating my blog periodically also.
ReplyDeleteI would love to chat about this with you. And thanks for commenting, because I haven't posted for a while and really need to get into the habit of doing it. In fact, I'll write another post in a minute, because I can't write all of the info in the comment block (Not enough room) But I do have to tell you, I've been admiring your running. I used to be a runner and I miss it. But please share with me! I went to a BBQ at one of my friends last night and she told me about the new WW and she LOVES it compared to the old WW (They focus on healthy reduction of carbs and I need that! Carbs are my trigger) so I am going to my first meeting tomorrow. Thanks for commenting. And lets talk about this - would love to hear your experience, the Dr your seeing, how things are working out for you.
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